English Mock Feedback and advice Q6

Before we look at samples of your work and look at what made them successful or less so, let's look at the mark scheme.  There are several things that you need to be very aware of as you plan, and then write, your responses.

The thing that most of you did not do, was to indicate that you were aware of the FORM that you were supposed to be writing in.  Are you being asked to write a letter, an article, an entry for a blog...  whatever it is, it will be something, not just a piece of writing.  It will have a PURPOSE and through your structure, style and content, you must show that you are aware of that purpose, and that you are aware of the AUDIENCE.

So, if you are writing a letter, as in this case, start with Dear... and end with Yours....

If the audience is specifically named, you need to show that you are aware of this.  So, if the audience in this case is the editor of the newspaper you could start, Dear Sir and end Yours Faithfully.  If the form had been an article you should have had a HEADING.  If the form had been a blog you would have also needed a heading.  If the form had been a speech, you could have written a title like: Transcript of speech delivered to .....on 12th May 2015.  If the audience was your peers, you could make a reference to that in your opening sentence: We teenagers are often thought to be...


Use of Linguistic devices.

Most of you used more linguistic devices for Q5 than for Q6!  The linguistic devices that you did use a lot of was the rhetorical question.  However, you need to be able to show off an ability to use a variety of devices.  Irony, satire and hyperbole are the devices mentioned in the mark scheme but you could use any device that we have learnt about and used to analyse the writing of other people.  Look at the list of devices that I have given you for Q4 and think about how you could use each one.  Be careful in your use, however; you need a light touch rather than a heavy hand.

Structural Devices

Use a variety of paragraph lengths.  Short.  Single word (if appropriate) and longer, more complex paragraphs.  If you are writing an article, you may use SUBHEADINGS as well as a HEADING to indicate that you understand the FORM that you are writing in.  If you are writing an entry for a leaflet or a pamphlet, you may want to use bullet points at some stage, but not all the way through.

Punctuation

Show that you can use a variety of punctuation - but also be sure to get the basics right!  Don't forget that you can use : before a list, ; instead of because, a - in a variety of ways (and very few people use these - they're a bit scared of them (or they've forgotten they exist)!

Vocabulary

Use ambitious, interesting vocabulary that you know how to spell.

OTHER THINGS TO THINK ABOUT

• You should seriously consider completing Q6 before Q5.  Many of you are writing too much for Q5 and not leaving yourself enough time for the higher mark question.  It would not be a good idea to do these writing questions before the reading questions because the writing pieces are designed to complement the reading articles and you can use the odd quotation and piece of information in your Q6 or Q5 responses where relevant.
• You should get much better at managing your time.  Practise past questions TO TIME.  You have 35 minutes for this question.  Do not use more than 35 minutes.  You should leave about 5 minutes to think and plan and 5 minutes to check your work carefully for errors as well as checking for errors as you write.  Therefore, you should be writing for about 25 minutes.  2 pages to 2.5 pages of normal sized handwriting is enough.

Samples from your mock with a brief commentary.

The above piece was successful because it acknowledged the FORM by starting with a letter opening.  It used linguistic devices: rhetorical question but could have employed more, for example hyperbole or irony, understatement.   It was structurally successful because it used a variety of sentence and paragraph lengths, it used a variety of punctuation marks, accurately.  It used interesting vocabulary and spelt it correctly.  It was an engaging read which kept the reader interested throughout.

What makes the above answer successful is that it uses some really interesting argumentative techniques.  It uses quotations, rhetorical questions, repetition, it uses a circular 'narrative' with the end of the piece echoing the beginning.  What it didn't do was acknowledge the FORM and whilst I haven't punished it too much for this, the examiner might well do so.